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Tuesday, January 25, 2005

so..

i'm gonna be a mom.

should be glad, happy, never sad.

but i don't know how i can go on much longer.

my eyes are closing, i'm dizzy, and i can't sit still.

i feel like dying.

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

someday, we'll have a go at it.

(inspired by a thread)

hello dzoiey, this is a letter to your future self, one year from now. i hope you will not disappoint me. you have a huge compilation of artworks. they are beautiful. you are now ready to show it to the world. it may be a small world like deviantart or any art website of some sort. either way, you will do good. it will be a 40-page 8 x 10 showcase. any medium will do. put everything in there. make it come alive.

i can't wait.

tonight i write the saddest lines

Pablo Neruda (1904-1973)
TONIGHT I CAN WRITE

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
Write, for example, `The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
And I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is shattered and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight searches for her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night, whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. Like my kisses before.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.



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this is so sad. my all time favorite poem.
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